4 Beers with Hitch and the Ixman!
You know, I have a really great idea for a nightly talking head show.It stars Christopher Hitchens and the Ixman (hey - it's my blog). We'll feature the usual topical interview roundup as most everyone else. The catch is that all guests must have had 4 beers (or the equivalent of some other adult beverage) before they go on screen.
Don't you think we'd learn a whole lot more about our guests if they were under a more induced state, temporarily free from their, er, constraints? I bet, for example, that George Will would be completely different, and altogether more interesting, after a few Shiners. Wouldn't you love to hear Rosie try to defend some of her more assinine statements after she - oh wait - you'd not be able to tell the difference there. But you see my point. Don't even get me started on Mel Gibson.
The beauty of this format is that the principal interviewers - Hitch and I - would be more or less unaffected, as we are only just getting started at 4!
We could have a cool little counter or meter across the bottom of the screen which would show the number of drinks thus far consumed. Of course we could turn that to a digital counter for popular figures like John Daly or Keith Richards.
This is ideal for HBO, as the language would be scorching and the topics - to say the least - broad.
UPDATE: Thank you Insty readers and Instapundit! Please come in and have a seat. Uh, would you like a beer?
posted by Ixman at 3:56 PM
26 Comments:
Why base truth-interviewing on intoxication-- how's about fatigue?
Get your puffer-bellies on a three-mile run, then fifty pushups followed by windsprints. Then ask, "On principle, why is Ahmadinejad like a cow-pie?" The first to answer, "Because both are meadow-muffins" is excused from doing x-number of situps.
"Mens sana in corpore sano", eh?
That pic of rosie captures it perfectly!
Especially on Naitonal Talk Like a Pirate Day!
Garrrr (hic)
pyrthroes:
Because Ann Coulter and Herr Ahnold would be permanent guest hosts. Michael Moore could only show up once.
Alas, some of us who do not use alcohol would view being required to drink four beers before speaking as just another form of Bush torture or, more cleverly, Busch torture.
anonymous:
Alas, some of us who do not use alcohol would view being required to drink four beers before speaking as just another form of Bush torture or, more cleverly, Busch torture.
Quite right! That's why they could have a "4 Hits from medicinal marijuana" for the lefties.
How about we just put the interviewees under the barbaric CIA interrogation methods of noogies and wedgies?
Right. I'll give Hitch the noogie and you give Rosie the wedgie.
I suspect that last one violates something somewhere. Probably pretty harshly too.
Many machines on Ix.. Better than those on Richese...
Richese?
I'm more of a Dan Simmons guy myself.
Comedy Central had a show where some comics in Vegas played poker while drinking hard. They played some cards, told jokes, insulted each other, refused to tip the waitress and farted a lot.
It lasted one episode.
Rosie O'Donnell, huh?
I'm guessing here, but too be fair, you'd probably have to adjust your "four beer" requirement in relation to the guest's body weight!
Yes, we could sandwich it between reruns of Real Sex and Bill Maher.
"That's why they could have a "4 Hits from medicinal marijuana" for the lefties."
I'm a rightie who doesn't drink so don't bogart that joint, hippie.
While "4 Beers" has a ring to it, might I suggest a slight format/title change - ".10 with Hitch and Ix!" Before anyone can say anything, they have to blow at least a .10 on an Intoxilyzer. That ought to balance out any inherent body weight advantage...
Another thought - a "sudden death" round, with increasing BA levels as the show goes on.
Ooh, I like that sudden death round thingy. Or you could just give a two minute warning each show.
To really get energy, you'd have to get several guests blowing a .10 at the same time. Especially if you have five or six of them all drinking together beforehand, then pick two at the last minute. The other few could join the studio audience.
Redhawke
Excellent! That does negate Hitch and Ix's natural advantage, though.
And they'd have to drink another beer during each commercial break.
I think the format should be what Rodney Dangerfield propsed in "Back to School."
"Waitress, bring a pitcvhr of beer every 15 minutes until someone passes out. Then bring one every 10 minutes!"
I think the format should be what Rodney Dangerfield propsed in "Back to School."
"Waitress, bring a pitcher of beer every 15 minutes until someone passes out. Then bring one every 10 minutes!"
I got a better idea. How about you can have 1 minute of mike time if you drink a beer or other alcoholic beverage with the same alcohol content as one beer.
If you drink 5 in a row, you get 10 minutes of mike time.
That would be a nice way to create "Crossfire" debates that are actually enjoyable to watch.
If you want to talk, just drink more beer as your opponent is lambasting your position.
The idea is interesting, but not original: Ted Kennedy has been employing this technique for decades.
Mazurland Blog discovered you through your Instalanche. Nice concept. We've linked to it: http://mazurland.typepad.com/myweblog/2006/09/db4l.html
You know, this show could redefine the term "puke liberal"...
"Marty......!"
/Hannity
Capital idea. Brings the TV "Drinking Class" back into vogue . . . like Dean Martin and Jackie Gleason.
"Brought To You BYyyyyy . . . Jihad Gin, The Bacardi of Baghdad, Hammas Genuine Draft, Sadr Scotch . . . ."
Yes, but does *anyone* remember Foster Brooks?
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